Yes, it would seem that The Blahs have settled in and made themselves quite at home in my psyche. As I’m sure many of you have already deduced from my lack of posting lately, I’m not feeling so hot mentally. Much of it is work-related, but I’m not getting any enjoyment from stitching lately, either. You know you’re in bad shape when stitching seems like a chore. 🙁
On the work front, I’m being not-so-gently nudged out of my current position and have had to find a spot for myself. This should prove to be interesting, but I’m kind of riding the fence in between the two right now. I’m running out of work to do in my current position and they are not ready for me to move into my new one yet.
I’m bored. I don’t deal well with being bored. And it’s a pervasive boredom that has made its way into my personal life, as well. I’m bored with my stitching, and yet, I want to keep working through my WIPs, so what ends up happening is that I don’t stitch at all. I’m guessing that I might have to allow myself a small new start or two in order to get my mojo back.
It’s amazing how extensive depression can become; weaving its way through your entire life. I’ve even had thoughts about closing One Star’s Light. It’s that bad, but I know better than to make big decisions like that in my current state of mental health. Never make big decisions when you’re not feeling yourself. You may come to regret them later.
In other news, Terry is working on finishing our basement so that we’ll have more room in the house. Once finished, I’ll finally be able to move the exercise equipment into the basement, along with the computers, freeing up more room for my crafts, plus allowing us to have a separate music room. Terry has a good chunk of the drywall up now and the bathroom will be ready for tile flooring later this week.
We decided that each of us is having too much trouble buying presents for the other for Christmas, so we decided to get ourselves a combined gift instead. We hit an online Black Friday sale at Dick’s Sporting Goods and bought ourselves a combination pool table, with air hocky and table tennis capabilities. It will be perfect for the basement, but we’ll need to make room for it for Christmas so that we can play, even if its not finished down there.
So, that’s about it for me. That’s what I’m up to. Oh, I started with a new psychiatrist whom I absolutely adore. We’re working on changing the meds, which is going to take a while. I’m working my way up on a new drug called Lamictal that should help with the depression, but it will take 7 weeks or more to reach theraputic levels. After that, we’ll work me off of the Abilify and Zyprexa that the other doctor had me on. This new doc and I see exactly eye-to-eye and I am really grateful for that. She’s definitely worth the money it costs to see a doctor who is out of network.
I hope to be feeling a bit better before Christmas gets here. At this point, I haven’t even put a lick of decorations up. But, we are going to buy a new artificial tree tomorrow. Maybe once that’s up, I’ll feel more into the holiday season. I hope all of you are doing well and getting into the joy of the holidays!
Oh yikes, I’m so sorry to hear that your not feeling yourself. Please know that we all love you and take heart in knowing that we’re your friends and wish nothing but the best for you 🙂
Take care!
Depression is a terrible thing to deal with, but with the meds and the doctor you really like, you’re way ahead of the game. Hopefully the new meds will be a big improvement over the old ones and you’ll start feeling more like yourself again.
Jenna (((hugs))) I’m sorry you are feeling so blah. I’m happy for you that you have found a good doctor and agrees with you on your meds.
I’m not surprised to hear that you’re struggling still with depression, tho of course I wish you could wake up tomorrow and never have it descend on you again! But it’s good news about your new psychiatrist! Hopes and prayers that the new meds will help and you’ll soon feel better. Hugs!
(((Jenna)))
I’ve heard absolutely WONDERFUL things about Lamictal. I have 3 or 4 friends on it and nobody’s had anything negative to report yet.
It’s so nice hearing from you again. Hang in there, I am sure the meds and mood will balance out soon and you will feel a bit more like your stitchie self again.
**((HUGS)) to chase the blah’s away**
Sorry to hear you’re having a rough time of it, Jenna. I’m glad that you like your new doctor and I hope you’re back to feeling yourself soon! Try not to push yourself too much…do what you can to make yourself happy. 🙂
I’m just relieved to hear you talking about what’s going on , Jenna. I have been worried, but hung up by not wanting to “pry”. Dumb, huh?
I *always* have a dip around the holidays – I don’t know if it’s the short daylight hours, the high hopes from the holidays themselves, being far from family … god knows. February almost always sees a good spike, though, in my overall feeling. I hope you’ll also be feeling more like yourself, seeing the fun in challenges again. Enjoy that new pool table and the room you’re freeing up for a music room, etc.
And most of all, take care!!!!
I’m glad your new psychiatrist is so much better Jenna. You’ve been on my mind a lot. (((hugs)))
I’ve been wondering about how you were feeling.
Let me know if you need to talk
Hi, I will be offline until mid Jan. Keep well, and know I will be thinking of you.
xx
I’m so sorry about your depression. Changing the meds may be just the right way to go iff the current ones are not effective. Keep trying until you find the right ones!
Hi Jenna, sorry to hear that you are having the blah’s. I know how you feel-been having them myself. This time of the season just seems to make it worse. I hope that things will get better for you soon. I sent your Christmas exchange peice today. I sent is via the brown truck instead of the good old usps. Hopefully, you will have it by Tue or Wed. Take care and I am thinking about you! {{hugs}}
Hang in there, sweetie. Definitely don’t make any important decisions until you feel better. Hugs.
I’m sorry to hear about your blahs, but I can totally relate. I hope that the job situation works itself out and that you will not have the persistent boredom. I know how numbing that can get. And it does creep into every area of your life – along with the depression. I am so glad to hear that you have found a new doctor that is hearing you and working with you on the meds and where you want to be. That is awesome. Take care, and please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. Your gift to each other sounds amazing and fun!!
Sorry to hear you’ve not been feeling yourself lately. I’m glad to hear you’ve found a doctor that sees things the way you do. It’s much easier that way. ((hugs))
So I deal with the same issues and for a 21 year old trying to work in society it’s very tough. Most importantly I’m curious…I currently take Abilify and am thinking about taking Yaz due to serious PMDD I wish was tolerable. I feel you pain and am thankful I’m not alone in this struggle. So my question is, would the two be okay to take together? Do you think, maybe from personal experience, that maybe there has been changes in your moods still a week or two before your period?
I hope you’re doing well and Happy Holidays 🙂