Tale of a Shooting Star…

I’m still here, mostly. I’m still trying to climb up the side of this pit of depression that I’m stuck in. I’m not at the bottom of the pit, but I’m definitely not at the top, either. I’m somewhere in the middle, perhaps.

I sleep all the time now. I think I use it as an escape, honestly. I sleep pretty much when I’m not at work. Work is slowly getting better, with more to do in my new position and recently a bit of work to do in my old position, as well.

I’m fighting a UTI, trying to flush lots of water through my system during the day (you know, when I’m not asleep). That does seem to be doing the trick, so hopefully no doctor visit or antibiotics will be needed. Yay!

I haven’t stitched in over a week (see above reference to my sleeping patterns). In fact, I sometimes sleep from the time we get home until it’s time to go to bed. I even miss dinner at times. It’s just a difficult place for me to be right now. I really wish there would be more sunshine, but that only helps so much. I know I’m supposed to be exercising and that’s supposed to help, according to my therapist (and it actually does), but if I can’t even motivate myself to stay awake, how the heck am I going to motivate myself to exercise?

Ahhhh… the vicious cycle in all its glory.

Well, I thought that I might finish the bottom half of Pretty Posies last night, but it turned into a wierd afternoon/evening. We had a power outage at work that, for various reasons I really can’t go into, caused everyone to go home. Unfortunately for me, Terry was in a meeting at another building nearly 30 minutes away. So, thankfully, I was able to hitch a ride with a friend back to his house and hang out until Terry was out of his meeting and able to pick me up. We ended up staying there for dinner, which was very nice of our friends. It was a nice little visit and I really appreciate them allowing me to impose on their daily life so unexpectedly.

Anyway, when we got home, I suddenly became very sleepy and actually went up to bed around 9 PM with nary a stitch to be seen. I slept in a couple of hours this morning, too, so I think I’m fighting off some bug; probably the one Terry still has that doesn’t want to go away. I would have worked from home today, but my laptop was still at work due to the power outage and not being able to go back in for it. Oh well!

Christmas is well and truly gone now for this year (actually, last year). We came home from work early on Friday to find my parents had just arrived and were unpacking their car. Good timing! Friday evening we called and ordered a pizza, then Terry and I ran out to the grocery store for the remaining provisions needed for the Saturday feast. By the time we got back, the pizza had already arrived, so we ate and then opened presents. Woohoo! More presents. 🙂

We were spoiled all over again, which was nice. The biggest gift, I think, was a set of sheets for our bed. That may not seem like a big deal, but we only have the set we bought when we bought the bed. When was that, a year or more ago? I don’t even remember anymore. I washed them on Sunday and put them on the bed. Terry can’t stand having the scent of fabric softener on the sheets because it aggravates his allergies, so they are a little scratchy right now, but they’ll be broken in soon enough.

I also got a sweater from my dad. This is an annual tradition. He goes out on his own and buys a sweater for each of his girls. He always picks such nice ones, too; it’s a treat to see them each year. My mother knitted me two cowls to wear if the weather happens to get cold again (it’s in the 50’s here today) and one has angora in it, I think. It’s just wonderfully soft and snuggly. I may end up pulling them up over my ears as a kind of headwrap if it ever gets truly cold this winter.

I won’t go on and on about what we got because I have other things to discuss. Saturday was our second attempt at a big meal. The turkey went into the oven at 11 AM and Terry went up for a nap. I decided to surprise him and got everything else prepped and ready to go into the oven when the turkey came out. I woke him when the little thermometer in the turkey popped up. I think it was nice for him to be able to come down and find everything ready to go into the oven. 🙂

Poor guy still has his cold. It moved down into his chest and is just lingering. He’s just been coughing so much. I feel badly for him, but, at the same time, I am determined not to get it myself. I’ve been going to sleep at 10 PM for the past few weeks, so I think it’s helping me to get enough sleep which, in turn, is keeping my immune system strong. At least, that’s what I think is happening.

But I digress. Back to the weekend news. My parents had to leave bright and early on Sunday because my mom forgot to pack her pills for that day by accident and wanted to get home by noon or 1 PM to be able to at least take the second dose and figure out how to get caught up on the morning ones she missed.

And then I sunk back into my depression. I’ve been on a roller coaster the past week, with Wednesday night’s relapse and then Sunday’s. Sunday, I think my mood sank due to the sudden exit of people from the house. We went from the excitement of having people on Friday night, then more people on Saturday, then no one but ourselves on Sunday. I did some exercise, which can help, according to my psychologist and I also stitched. I think the light from my Ott light might actually be helping my SAD, so I’ll have to keep up with the stitching this winter. That’s a good excuse, right? 😉 So I made some pretty good progress on Pretty Posies yesterday. I’ll have to take a picture of it when I finish the bottom half. That might even be tonight, if I’m good about it.