Tale of a Shooting Star…

It’s a beautiful, only now becoming partly cloudy day outside today. The sky is a lovely shade of blue. Too bad the temperature won’t get above freezing and it’s windy, too. Terry just came in from being at a meeting and the poor guy was chilled!

On the work front, I’m developing some RSI symptoms in my shoulders due to the repetitive work that I’ve been doing lately. It’s been coming on at the end of the day in one shoulder and I go home and rest it, but today, it’s in both shoulders. I was going to take a half-day, but Terry went out for sushi after his meeting, just getting to our building a little bit ago in time to inform me that he had a 3 PM meeting that he had forgotten about. *groan* Oh well, I guess the rest will have to wait until after that meeting, as well. Something told me that I should work from home today. Maybe I should listen next time? 🙂

Other than that, though, it’s been a good day so far and I’m just happy to be here!

Yes, it’s true. I’m blogging again. Hard to believe I haven’t done so in a month. I don’t think I’ve touched a needle in that time, either, which is even harder to believe.

The depression is waning. The psychiatrist thinks that we jumped into taking me off of one of the bipolar medications (which also has antidepressant properties) too soon; while I was still coming up to therapeutic levels of the new bipolar med. So, she put me back on a low dose of the medication and I’m feeling better.

It’s been a long, hard road this winter. My therapist keeps telling me that I’m a trooper and that I’m doing everything right, so I have good support in that area.

I also have all of the wonderful comments that keep coming in, wondering where I am, a postcard from Barbara and even a gift from Dawn! Check out her blog to see the post with a lovely picture of the heart box that she made for me to lift my spirits. I have a great support system in all of my blogging friends! THANK YOU!

Most importantly, I am learning how to manage my depression. I know that going into work is critical for me, both to help keep me busy and distracted, as well as the social element. Working from home is not an option right now, unless Terry stays with me. Even now, I still tend to crash out on the couch after dinner. Weekends are a bit harder, unless I have something planned like going out to dinner or something. I tend to turn into a little hermit on the weekends, which just seems to exacerbate the depression, especially while it’s still cold out.

As I said, I haven’t stitched at all this month (yet). I ordered smaller new Just Nan pieces from Drema at Needlecraft Corner to try to help me kickstart my stitching again. They arrived yesterday, so now all I have to do is kit one up and get stitching. Maybe tonight, if I’m not feeling tired again when I get home.

So, that’s it for me right now. I had to mark all of your lovely blog feeds as read so that I can start from scratch; otherwise, I’d never be able to keep up. Look for comments from me as you post anew.

I’m still here, mostly. I’m still trying to climb up the side of this pit of depression that I’m stuck in. I’m not at the bottom of the pit, but I’m definitely not at the top, either. I’m somewhere in the middle, perhaps.

I sleep all the time now. I think I use it as an escape, honestly. I sleep pretty much when I’m not at work. Work is slowly getting better, with more to do in my new position and recently a bit of work to do in my old position, as well.

I’m fighting a UTI, trying to flush lots of water through my system during the day (you know, when I’m not asleep). That does seem to be doing the trick, so hopefully no doctor visit or antibiotics will be needed. Yay!

I haven’t stitched in over a week (see above reference to my sleeping patterns). In fact, I sometimes sleep from the time we get home until it’s time to go to bed. I even miss dinner at times. It’s just a difficult place for me to be right now. I really wish there would be more sunshine, but that only helps so much. I know I’m supposed to be exercising and that’s supposed to help, according to my therapist (and it actually does), but if I can’t even motivate myself to stay awake, how the heck am I going to motivate myself to exercise?

Ahhhh… the vicious cycle in all its glory.